Mr. Andersen, welcome back. We missed you.

Had a co-worker insult me to my face today, and frankly, I don't have to take that. I don't care how much experience you have; I've done the fucking legwork. Look, I've set things up the way I have set them up for a reason, and if you want me to change them, at least listen to my reasoning: because the fact is that I considered doing things your way, and rejected that approach, for actual reasons, and while you may disagree, I do have them. And if you won't let me finish a sentence of my explanation, say "I won't argue with you", and storm off calling me hopeless, all I can say is:

Enjoy doing it yourself, lady. In about...16 to 20 weeks. But I think you'll find that first step is a lu lu...and if you don't smarten the fuck up you'll find out a lot sooner.

Applied for PT/On Call at Large Public Library today. We will see.

Happy Endings Ain't F' Wimps

Fans! is back. How did I miss this?

This is one of the oldest webcomics, and a few years ago went dark, putting its archives behind a paywall and wrapping up all its remaining loose ends. It seems to be back with a vengeance, and that particular theological argument (paywall or mechandising) seems to be settled.

Well, almost all its loose ends, except the question of how things would work out in its central relationship. And here's where I have a dilemma, as discussing that without giving away a major spoiler that only appears in the 1600th installment of an 1750 episode webcomic is a hard trick to pull off. But it's fair to say that this is one of the only mainstream portrayals of a non-vanilla relationship I know of, and one that treats kinkiness as a character trait, not a plot device or something to be overcome. This is s strip about Science Fiction Fans saving the world, after all, and next to all the other tpes of geekdon, an unconventional relationship seems to fit very naturally.

It's odd to me how much there seems to be a link between geekyness and kinkiness. Teak mentioned this a month ago, and Jaye's new friend mentioned it last week. And here again.

I need to dig into this more in writing, I think. Well, after I feed C's cats, do the recycling, and pack for tomorrow. God, I hate being a night owl at times. If I last at my job long enough to leave on my terms it will be a major miracle.

Useless, but not for long/ The future, is comin' on

Well, it's not as if I mind that your heart ain't exactly breaking.

So it seems Lief had a pre-existing arrangement, which was very casual, but he's now asked to tighten things up a bit, and that's where she wants to spend her energy. I don't think Teak saw that coming when she tried putting the two (three?) of us together.

On the one hand, it's a shame, because our styles were pretty compatable, but on the other, I am still pretty messed up in a relationshippy sense, which is what I think Lief was starting to think about. And there were about 2 or 3 major deal breakers lurking like mines below the surface out in the medium distance- religion, drugs, and health, just for starters. So, that was an entertaining two weeks, anyway.

And well, on the other front, Teak has a girlfriend who she's crazy about, occasional urge to indulge boxing glove impulses with me or not, so better start investigating other baskets and the possibility of eggs to be put in.

Where does this leave me? Itches a little scratched, feeling a little better, but the fundamentals are unchanged. A little higher up the hill, a little bit more braced for when the next wave comes.

And once again, a bit numb.

It's Niece's birthday this weekend, so that should be a good time, if I can keep it from being a drain-Uncle-of-all-his-money fest...Ai ya.

Reviews!

Thursday: Saw Spamalot, with friends. Excellent. Can't discuss without spoilers.

Friday: Saw The Dark Knight in IMAX, with friends. Excellent. Can't discuss without spoilers.

Saturday: Teak's out of town, so went to Rascal's with Lief. She has an excellent bed for chaining people to. Excellent. Can't discuss without spoilers.

Sunday: Had best Dim Sum in Vancouver, with Lief and roommate. Excellent. Highly recommended. Catsitting for C while she is away at brass camp. Watched Penn and Teller's Bullshit! Season One. Excellent. I don't beleve it's a spoiler to say they debunk a lot of bullshit.

Monday: The heat finally breaks a little, but my desk is Ice Station Zero. Bad news in the company family. Work itself awful and draggy. Bah. Procedures Manual. Writer's Block. Can't work from home with my machine having brain seizures. Not a gripping read. Thumbs down, way down.

Applecore

I also wrote this yesterday, and RMT kinda liked it. Who knows, I may need to prove authorship some day.

So, called Apple Care, they close at Six

Thus, went down to the Apple Store.

But, it seems we all need our appointments

If- we want to see the "Genius Bar" for service.

"Yeah, you can make an appointment online", says the iClerk.

"But, my computer's broken." I then say.

"Gee, that's too bad," says the nervous blueshirt,

"Here, use our internet" he goes on.

"Okay, there's my contact info" says I,

"Whoops, no space today", he then opines.

"Hey, it only shows Thursday Friday", I note.

"Yeah, I guess just two days at a time-

Hey! whatabout tomorrow night or Friday"?

"No, I'm not free till Saturday", I then sigh,

"This", I make a gesture, "is a bad business model"

"Gosh", says iClerk Stephen, chastened.

"But," I'm trying, "can't I just drop it off here?"

"No", he checks with someone orange,

"No, it takes time to take your info"

Fuck, I'm thinking, how much fucking info?

"Here", says Stephen, quickly, "our card with web address"

Again, I'm thinking, My computer's busted

"Thanks", I say and smile but don’t quite mean it,

Out, I walk, while thinking to myself,

Damn, this place sure looks like Mammon,

Mammon, with these yuppies groping touchscreens,

Gasping, like they've never fucked before.

Soviet Akihabara

Better today. The sunlight doesn't bother me, and the black dog seems to be at bay. For now.

Took my broken Mac Mini down to the Apple Store, and ran into a brick wall, with the chipper but helpless iClerk completely unable to do anything, as imprisoned in his script as any bishoojo shopgirl I met in Tokyo, his faintly panicked smile exactly like those I saw when some hapless teenager was wondering what to do with the crazy crazy Gaijin who just kept wandering all over the invisible lane markers on the highway of shared cultural assumptions, always wanting to know why. Asking those horrible, horrible why questions. The staff are wonderful, the service friendly, but they literally cannot do a thing once you jump the tracks of their little customer service script. And the script requires you to make an appointment online to get your machine serviced.

What the propellerheads at Apple never seem to have contemplated is:

1) If someone's computer is not working, their internet access is likely to be nil.

and

2) Even if you let people use the store computer, if your store refuses to see anyone without an appointment, it may be a good idea to let people book an appointment more than 48 hours in advance.

not to mention

3) Some computer problems really do not require a half hour appointment. They just need 5 minutes, as in: Hi, my computer's RAM is bad, I already ran a diagnostic using your tools, it's under warranty, here's my proof of purchase and my contact info, call me when it's ready. byyyeeee!

Hello, again.

-It sounds like you're trying to use all this anger and negative energy and bend it to your own purposes, said Teak over dinner, last week.

That's right,

I say to her, as I have so many times, to myself,

I understand, from when my lover died ten years ago, grief is a kind of poison. I'm not going to sit in my apartment, and wait for the black dog to show up.

-But the black dog is here with you already. It already has its teeth in your throat.

...

I can't recall what I said to that. I think I just listened, and let her speak of when her heart was ripped out, not so long ago.

But something is breathing down my neck today, for sure.

Line of the night

-So, what would the Catholic Church think of you going out with a Pagan Priestess?

I think they'd be fine with it, so long as I felt sufficently guilty and confessed afterwards. Not like I'd be able to escape, really.

-True. And you could always confess to me.

That could work.


Also note, recovering heartbreak victims, if someone says

"Hey, wanna go to Vegas sometime?"

and your first thought is

OHMIGODSHEWANTSTOGOTOVEGASANDGETMARRIED,

No, it's just you, freaking out, and yes,
it means you are still kinda f'ed up.

And on that note, yes, C is just fine.

Clumsy. Or, yeah, before stepping into mid-air, let's just make note of this moment...

So, I have LD's birthday party at 5, Then afterwards Lief is coming over for dinner and ?, Teak may be joining us if she's free, and on the tail end of that IM conversation, C innocently messaged and asked what I was doing tonight. I really hope that wasn't the sound of her vanilla crush finally smashing against the brick wall of how things are. Sigh. I like you, but I can only protect you from yourself so much, kiddo. I thought you'd gotten over that. I hope I'm just imagining things...

I'm worried enough - or precoccupied enough - with me, Lief, and Teak and how that's gonna play out. I think when two hungry hungry people sit down to dinner, it's hard to focus on planning the menu and waiting for your dining companion, rather than just diving headfirst into the buffet. And yet, here we are sitting down to dinner anyway.

Speaking of which, better stop by the drugstore...just in case. Lief is ravenous, after all.

Damn, this stuff is so very complicated. A function of the complexity of the personalities involved, I am sure, but still...

Clothes Swapping

Placeholder, wherein I discuss hanging at a vestement-related social gathering with Teak, and gratuitous nudity occurs.

Today's Job Interview, as a haiku.

Painfully rusty:
A bunt, a single at best
Needed a triple.

My Dinner with Teak. (July 8)

A placeholder. Wherein, I try to catch up the last two weeks. hah!

Never Asked Questions, July 2008

So it's difficult to find the time to blog, but I will keep chipping at it. In case anyone wonders,

-There really is a lot more going on than I get a chance to blog about. I'm in a recovery phase, and the less time spent in front of a computer the better. I have spent 10 hours a day at a desk for a living for four years now, and that's stopping as soon as I figure out how. Maybe a book some day. Who knows? Will I ever get back to talking about meeting Phil Foglio or that douche merchant on ebay? Who can say?

-No, nobody wore a fur suit. There was a cute set of fuzzy ears, and a lot of collar and leash play, and woof woof noises, and some doing it like they do on the discovery channel, but it was in general just plain adorable. I supplied the petting and brushing.

-No, there isn't really a theme per se. But writing in English should be pithy, it should be funny, and it should teach you something.

-I've reverted back to my traditional name for this blog, not so much because I need the anonymity, but because others might. Every name in here is a pseudonym, and some of them are pseudonyms for a pseudonym. I don't really care about my anonymity at this point, and may never again, but some of the folks I'm meeting now are very young, and may not be out to their parents, and so on. People's lives can get destroyed by some of this stuff. Many interesting stories to tell, but not all in this venue, I think.

Didn't see that one coming, or, Department of things to do before I die.

Things to do before I die checklist:

57) Have a threesome in a fancy hotel with an ex-porn star and a furry, both at least ten years younger than I am:

done.

And no, I'm not telling you that one.

But it was fucking awesome. And, all things considered, pretty wholesome.

Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was a freak like meee...